PMS

Yes I do remember that a restaurant review on Ha!Ha! Bar & Grill is up due. However, I'm PMS-ing real badly right now. It's not the best time to write a review.

It's gonna be a bad review anyway.

Can't believe that I've only got 1 week of holidays left, times does fly when you're having fun. The exam pressures are sinking in as well. As you may have assumed, I'm about to be consumed by stress again. I shall be releasing a large and last dose of entries in the next week, before surrendering my soul to my exams.

Happy Easter everyone.

Butter Basted Roast Turkey Joint

My heart stopped...

While I was carving through your golden skin...
Every stroke squeezed more juice out of you...
Your aroma, seduced my senses...
And your taste, is a firework of flavours...

My appetite is at your mercy, Butter Basted Roast Turkey Breast Joint !!!

Got this baby for Half Price at Sainsbury's for £2.49!
What a bargain! Especially when it can last for up to 3 huge meals =)

Eating is my mission this holiday. Gotta do what I have to do to whet the food monster that resides in my stomach. I had so much food today I must write it down...

Breakfast
Hot Chocolate
Scottish Porridge Oats

Morning Tea
Honey and Lemon
Chocolate Brownies

Lunch
Laksa Noodles
Sunny side ups x 2
Mushroom and herbs
Pink grapefruit squash

Afternoon Tea
Peach Yogurt
A bag of chips
An orange

Dinner
Roast turkey
Stir Fried Veggies
Rice

The little food monster in me is very happy and contented...Purrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....

Coming up next,
Restaurant Review: Ha! Ha! Bar & Grill

I kissed Renny

I Kissed A Girl
by Katy Perry

This was never the way I planned, not my intention.
I got so brave, drink in hand, lost my discretion
It's not what I'm used to, just wanna try you on.
I'm curious for you, caught my attention.

I kissed a girl and I liked it,
the taste of her cherry chapstick.
I kissed a girl just to try it,
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it.
It felt so wrong,
it felt so right.
Don't mean I'm in love tonight.
I kissed a girl and I liked it (I liked it).

No, I don't even know your name, it doesn't matter.
You're my experimental game, just human nature.
It's not what good girls do, not how they should behave.
My head gets so confused, hard to obey.

Us girls we are so magical,
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable.
Hard to resist, so touchable.
Too good to deny it.
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent.

La La Locks

As promised, SURPRISE!!! I got my hair cut again! Well, actually I always DIY it in the toilet, but there's a huge difference this time =) Got tired of the short hair. AGAIN. Now you know I'm such a "hangat hangat tahi ayam" kind of person. I figured its too troublesome to maintain short hair now, because it looks terrible if it's not maintained on a regular basis. And I haven't got the money and time to keep it looking decent you see :/ However, it was good when I first got it.

Taa-daa...! Introducing La-La Ling.
(I lost my nose here, like The Phantom of the Opera, hahahaha)
This cut is actually inspired by the bold bangs that are so popular on the runway right now.

Tyra Bank's solid strong bangs.
Who said La-la hair can't be high fashion!

My hair was also massively layered on the back to give a more edgy look, in addition to a more voluminous effect. The reason why I love it a super-duper-lot is because now I don't have to groom my eyebrows anymore, because it's hidden! Muahahahahahaha....

Total cost = £32.40, and this one price includes...

Stylist : Shireen
Wash and shampoo
Blowdry
Finished with styling & straightening
All the extra products they use
Coffee/Tea/Hot Chocolate
FREE UNLIMITED FRINGE TRIMS

I absolutely hate it when they charge extra for washing, and blowdry or even the extra bit of product they use on you. So this is ONE PRICE for the COMPLETE SALON TREATMENT, so you come out looking like a million bucks =) At the end of the day I lost count of how many products they used on my hair. There was at least 6 I'm sure. I thought they were really generous with their expensive products. To ensure that all their clients look good all the time, each hair cut comes with FREE UNLIMITED FRINGE TRIMS!!! Isn't this awesome? No more "bitten" looking fringe from our miserable toilet attempts. Fringe trims costs £5.00 in Beeston by the way.

I realize the cost is a little on the expensive side, especially for us students. But first, hear me out. Zullo & Holland is an award winning hairdresser in prestigious hair shows, its in the card. So basically its quality you're paying for. I am delighted with my cut because she gave me what I wanted. My stylist is amazing, and very pretty =) her name is Shireen. Ask for her.

Click the image above to go to their website.

Zullo and Holland
26 Upper Parliment Street
Nottingham NG1 2AD
Tel: 0115 950 4635

(same row as Burger King, beside Victoria Centre.)

£32.40 is basically the price for a Stylist. The price for Graduates are cheaper, and of course there are Director cuts if you have the moolah for it. Tell them you were introduced by me, I think you get some kind of discount as well. Newcomers and Students gets discounts as well =)

You're welcomed to go in for a free consultation with a stylist, and quotation as well. No pressure to commit to their services there. They are very busy, so make an appointment one week before.

lu la lu la lei song

*Updated*

"Loo La La Loo La La
Loo La Loo La Lay

Loo La Loo La Loo La
Loo La Loo La Lay

Loo La La Loo La La
Loo La Loo La Lay
Loo La Loo La Loo La Lay"

No, it wasn't meant to be the Numa Numa song. I've forgotten what it's called now, but it is one of the childhood songs that I used to sing... The song's in mandarin, that's for sure. But I can't seem to get the rest of the song, and yet this bit is on loop in my head. Replaying this bit over and over again, like a broken record.

How frustrating indeed!

To add salt onto wound, I am not inspired to study at all. I'ma just sit down and watch America's Next Top Model all day on YouTube. Speaking of YouTube, I found this video incredibly funny that I couldn't stop laughing for a full 5 minutes.



Or maybe it's just my sick sense of humour, I don't know. And no, I did not and do not have the luxury of watching the every single episode of Desperate Housewives. Torrents and I don't get along very well >.<

There's gonna be a surprise tomorrow, I am not telling just yet, but I hope it will be a good one =)

Hairdryer on Easter Break

Just the other day I was blow-drying my hair, with a hair dryer of course. Duh. Normally it would take me slightly over 5 minutes, at max power.

Barely 2 minutes into my drying, it went... *CLICK*

*CHUG*...... *chug*.................. *dead*

I flicked the switches frantically, repeatedly manipulated the power supply, but NADAH.
I slapped it left and right hoping it will recover like how a telly does, but NADAH.
I tried cursing the hair dryer for a full 5 minutes while it cools down, but still, NADAH.
Feeling guilty, I apologized to my hair dryer for another 5 minutes, STILL NADAH.

All I got was a foul burnt smell radiating from it's dead spout.
HOW CAN YOU DIE BEFORE YOU BURN MY HAIR THIS TIME??? T__T

FYI, my hair belongs to the EXTRA FLAMMABLE category, where any hair dryer would burn my hair before it can be dried. (Maybe it's my amateur techniques, but I like blaming it on my hair quality, so whatcha gonna do about it huh?)

Upset, I mourned over my loss for 3 seconds before I laid it to rest at its usual resting place.

The next day, I decided that I should not give up on it. No, it means too much to me. (Actually, a new hairdryer costs too much for me =P nevermind that) And guess what?!

THAT BLOODY THING JUST CAME BACK ALIVE!!!
Whirring away and burning my hair for all its worth, like nothing happened. I was over the moon. Mucus of joy overflowed my nose as my nostrils were filled with burnt hair smell...

And then it hit me. My hair dryer just had an Easter moment. You know the whole died and resurrected thing. Pardon me if I didn't get it right, for I am not familiar with the Bible. But yeah. To put it in another way, my hair dryer just had a self-declared Easter break.

Silly ol' Hairdryer. If you wanted a break, all you had to do was ask mommy...

******************************************************

I find that a lot more things than expected, are akin to drug addiction. I'm aware that it sounds totally strange, but hear me out.

Drug addiction is where there is a substance, and someone who relies on it both physically and psychologically. My definitions?

Drug
Gives a temporary rush of euphoria, but ill effects are persistent and long term.
Something one can definitely live without, and be better off without as well.
It makes you crave for it for the high. After about 6 months of exposure, it makes you completely dependent on it. Because you let it penetrate your body and soul, it knows you inside out. Now you're nothing but a puppet on strings, susceptible to its manipulations on your body. It knows when you're trying to run away, it can pull you back easily because you've given it control of yourself.

Addict
Initially in it for the rush. But gradually becomes aware of the side effects after awhile. You want to stop, but you can't. It's almost like you're under a spell. No matter how hard you try, your body screams for it, dreams about it... until you can no longer take it, and go back to it.

It all makes sense now. So many things can be related to this, like trying hard to diet, or even like an unofficial relationship with a cheater. Things a 5 year old can tell you its OBVIOUSLY WRONG, but you still make excuses to do it anyway. It's a sign of poor will, and no dignity.

The solution is simple, and yet difficult. If doing it cold turkey is not an option, you need to summon the willpower to wean off your addiction. Unfortunately, there is no miracle cure, and your other option will be none other than SELF-DESTRUCTION. All you need is to make the first step, and help will be there to guide you through it.

fire alarm and getting drunk

Easter break is ON!!! *applause* Back to blogging again. Hate it when I'm so caught up with work. I've got LOADS to say but they're all compressed inside me. I feel like an aerosol bottle. Depress me for a spray of frustration in your face.

PSSssttttt..... Long rojak post depressurised.

Broadgate Park (BGP) is getting on my nerves intolerably. I can't wait to move out of this dump. Really. On Monday, I was super horrified to find Broadgate Park seeking for nearly 700 pounds of extra payment. SHAME ON YOU. A money making company like you trying to rip us off? They insist on the entire block paying for extra cleaning/ damages incurred by a couple of bad apples I was unfortunate enough to live with. That's the most absurd piece of logic I've ever heard. Here's proof.

This is utter nonsense. How is that fair to any one of us at all?

Just last Tuesday, I was in the shower, happily smothering my hair with Olive and Ginseng shampoo (I swear it smells oh-so-good), lathering pink shower creme on my skin, doing my rendition of Britney Spears' Circus (it is beyond addictive <3). All of a sudden, the bloody fire alarm went off. Curses! Like, what am I supposed to do? Run out naked, maybe with a towel , into the 10'C air? I don't know. You tell me. Poll on sidebar. MUST DO.

Don't skip. DO POLL. I want to know what you think.

In case you're wondering, I took a sniff outside my shower. It wasn't my kitchen, great! I took 1 minute to wash off everything, put something on, and walked out dripping wet, and without any bra/underwear. Turns out that it is VERY COLD when I'm not wearing undies, it's not even funny. Allow me to defend myself by saying that I am scared of fire alarms ever since the day I set fire to my own kitchen. No joke. Bra or no bra, I will evacuate. Because I take ages to put them on. Ahem. Something to do with not wearing glasses when I get dressed, I suppose.

In the end? There was no fire. BUT. There was another fire alarm on Friday, and yes, A REAL FIRE just below my floor, no joke. It had to catch me at the most inconvenient time --- when I'm changing! What is it with fire alarms ringing when I'm bathing/changing/sleeping/eating ?! Can you say suay!

Negativity aside, SPRING has officially sunk in! The sun is shining, the ducks are mating, everything about Spring is simply amazing! Even some people are getting "in the heat", ya'know what I'm saying? Unusual levels of appearance consciousness, a need to go mate hunting...*hint hint*

Fields of white daffodils opposite Broadgate Park. Hell yeah the grass is greener over here!

Don't like white? Nature makes yellow daffodils too!

Oh, and I'm proud to say I fulfilled one of my New Year Resolutions already!

I. GOT. DRUNK.
Not walking straight, calling skinny people fat, kind of drunk.

It happened at Pitchers & Piano, because Rachael, Sara and Elwin are going back for Easter. A perfect excuse to gather and drink. Hahaha. It's all part of embracing the local English culture of drinking *wink* Don't bother reporting to my parents about it. I've already confessed my sins to them prior to this entry. Of course, letting them find out first through a blog entry would a most disastrous thing to do.

The gang and half of our drinks for the night. More to come.
Myself, YitLing, Rachael, Sara, Elwin, Albert and Simon.
Kelvin, IngChang and Daniel were busy buying more drinks at this point in time.

A shot of tequila with salt and lime.

JaegerBombs!
My new favourite alcoholic drink. Click for link to wikipedia.
The RedBull that came with it however pushed me straight into hyper mode. I suppose the caffeine content was too high for my tolerance, that I literally, just kept jumping, and jumping, and jumping on the dancefloor. I'm surprised they didn't just dump me on the dancefloor because I was too embarassing, hahahaha... Love you guys.

OJs tainted with vodka I think. Don't know how many shots went in there, along with some Jack Daniels on the rocks in the background, which I passed. The taste is way too foul for my liking.

The girls got drunk even before drinking, hahaha. They like my beef too =P
YitLing, Rachael, Sara.

Pinky me, blur looking Elwin, thirsty Albert and Poor Simon.
I like how this picture gives the illusion of me having a good complexion, but I dislike how it gives you all a good view up my nostrils =.=" In reality, I'm breaking out so bad, thank God for concealers.

Despite my red face, I can assure you that I was still thinking AND walking straight at that point. By that time, we've already had a few drinks, and there were plenty awaiting consumption on the table. At least we had the sense to cushion the alcohol with some McD's for supper!

I deem it as a camwhoring worthy moment as I have not had a McDonald's Happy Meal in ages. Kelvin just had to sabotage my attempts a gazilliion times. Grrrr... Bite you.

Serious note here.

I'd like to thank Albert and Simon specially, for supporting the drunken airhead all night, enduring her mindless rambles and streaks of "violence". For the record, you boys look amazingly fit and I mean it =D Honest. I look forward to living with you both next year, and I promise to be a good girl. A big shout out goes to Daniel, IngChang, and Kelvin as well, for sending me back to my room. Totally appreciate it. Oh, and I didn't mean it when I said I wanted to castrate someone. Heh heh.

No more drinking for me. At least for a month anyway. Hahahaha....

Interestingly, I dropped dead on my bed at 3am, only to wake up at 7am. Neither was there vomit nor any signs of a hangover as well. Powerful. I made myself a mental note to not take this as an excuse to drink more. But it tasted so good.... *slaps self*

In fact, the night actually started out by going to watch this musical, which is a university production. It was mind blowing, I should add. Fantastic costumes, promising talents, and music that lingers in your head. An impressive interpretation of Shakespeares' A Midsummer Night's Dream, worthy of note. Who would've guessed that it was the night I got drunk for the first time ever.

Children, it's not nice to not do your homework. Now be a good kid, run along and do the POLL on the sidebar, or the boogieman will make you.

Whew. Now this long post felt good =)

Busy and YouTube

I am currently up to my neck with work! Easter starts this weekend, and I'll be back because there's so much to blog about. Simply because I've been naughty, being up to no good very often lately. Heh heh heh. In the meantime, stay entertained with some YouTube videos. I won't be long I promise. Mwah.

Cutest singing sensation ever. Finalist of Britain's Got Talent 2006, Connie Talbot !





Proceed with caution beyond this point. Rated strictly 18-SX.






I hope you are entertained more than you are disgusted. Did you manage to see that turtle penis?

**UPDATE on Friday 30th March: XiaXue just blogged the same "Turtle Rapes Shoe" video! I can't believe it. What a coincidence!!! ^^

getting married

Today my cousin is getting married.

I extended my congratulations and blessings in a little card more than a week ago. Hopefully she will get it, because I feel dreadful for not being able to attend the wedding, or even congratulate the happy couple personally.

(Royal Mail had better not redirect my mail to Indonesia again. Malaysia = Indonesia. Seriously stupid, don't know how to read is it?)

She's getting married to a man whom she loves. From what I've heard, the lucky guy comes from a good family, and pretty wealthy too. His family is also very welcoming to my cousin, even paid a hefty sum for dowry. No wonder my other similarly aged cousins are swooning in envy Word has it that he's left a pretty solid impression on the extended family members! It can't get any better than this I guess.

Anyway... ahem.
This wedding thing has got me thinking, hard.

In any case, this cousin of mine is female, and we don't have a large age gap. I can't help but to compare our lives at this significant turn of events.

While she's happily settling down with the love of her life , I am living my days as a bachelorette, unattached and uninterested in a relationship.

While she is walking down the aisle in a beautiful white gown to say her vows, I'm slopping my way to the kitchen in my pyjamas to microwave leftovers for brunch.

While she is being congratulated on her happy occasion, I am being advised on intimidating patients with excessive honesty in counselling.

While she is kissing her groom, I am kissing my keyboard because I fell asleep doing Scripware -computer generated prescriptions.

I'm questioning my potentially pathetic present.

Sad as it sounds, I still insist on refusing to grow up. She has, and I think she is extremely brave. Marriage and responsibility is something I'm not ready to even think about. Has it already been more than 2 decades of life now? The days when I first put on my pink and brown kindergarten uniform didn't seem THAT long ago. Sigh. It's hard to accept that I am in early adulthood, reaching the end of student-hood, soon to join the hardworking citizens of the working class society.

To most women, she is having the ultimate fairytale ending, and I would be a complete disaster. I think this is another instance where I have failed to function as a female again. Personally I have dreams of becoming completely self sufficent, independent, to have abilities far more superior than any ordinary man and then some more.

Never once have I thought of having to marry a man for the sake of my living. Sure, having a partner to love is something I would welcome with open arms. However, my current prospects in the relationship department seems pretty bleak and hopeless. In spite of people showing interest, I've grown pretty numb in that sector to show any interest of that sort to anyone in return.

At the end of the day, I do want a baby of my own blood, more than a man in my life. The moment I become self sufficient, I shall go ask a genetically optimal suitor for sperm donation, because I want nothing less than the best genes for my baby. I don't need his love, I'm sure sperm is easier to ask for. For goodness sake, I'll even sponsor original DVD of his favourite pornography actress's work if that's what it takes for him to generate any sperm at all.

Despite my unconventional thoughts for my own life, I wish her the best, sincerely with all of my heart with the path she has chosen. As a cousin, I'm massively delighted that she has found what her heart desires. It must be truly blissful to marry someone you love. Because I know not every relationship can go that far.

Hello Leggies!

UK is finally heating up! With the tempertures rising up to the late single digits in Celcius, sing: "It's getting hot in here (so hot) so take off all your clothes" And I did. Some of it anyway. Shed my long trousers in exchange for a skirt!

Hello legs!
Long time no see, and you don't look half as bad as you do under the toilet lamp.
(Don't you dare enlarge the picture, I grained it for a reason =P)

I swear I haven't seen my legs like this for ages! Now that I've found a new "Full Length" Mirror using the reflection on my window (am I just too resourceful or what, hahaha!) a camwhoring session is compulsory to mark this landmark in time where I took vanity to a whole new level.

Just in case you were wondering why I'm wearing a skirt.
Because IT'S HOT!!! (Not me obviously, I meant the weather) So steaming hot these nights that I can barely fall asleep. Plus, why waste the generous hours of sun that we've been getting.

My poor legs have had enough being deprived of sunny rays and fresh air. It's horrifyingly porcelain pale I'm telling you. I dream of tanned latina legs that scream oh-so-sexy. But I know my legs are too short to even try to be sexy. Oh, and they've grown bigger =( Gotta do something about it before I get 2 x 100-year old tree stumps for legs. Nevertheless, doesn't hurt to keep it from looking worse hahaha.

So yeah, I've been stripping down to sleeveless tops and shorts (even skirts now) whenever I'm back into my very warm room. Stupidly angmoh-like, sunbathing in the Spring Sunshine... hoping for a more lively tone to my skin colour ( I'm starting to really hate being so zombie pale and lifeless ) , alongside Vitamin D mass production in The Skin Factory.

Pharmacy Ph-act of the Day
Dear Noobies, Vitamin D aides Calcium absorption for strong bones and teeth. Middle aged humans experience a halt to Calcium laydown in bones when Calcium stores reach their peak, while the elderly (especially women post-menopause) will then experience massive bone demineralisation as Calcium levels are released from bones and decreases , this leads to osteoporosis and susceptibility to fractures. To prevent this, maximise Vitamin D and Calcium exposure to your body before your Mid-Life Crisis.

Relevance

I still want to be able to kick ass and have teeth when I'm 80. It is important for me to be able to pronounce "fuck you" properly when I'm elderly. Imagine an 80 year old scolding someone "luck you" instead of "fuck you", super embarassing lah! Please I don't want that to happen to me.

I can't believe that I just churned out an entire blog entry just on my legs when I'm not even proud fo them to begin with. But oh, I did miss seeing them so much <3 I should just dye my hair blonde to match my personality, really. Because then, I can blame the blonde moments on my hair colour, hahahaha!

emergency update

I haven't updated in ages. There's not much to do, but I've been eating and sleeping plenty! Currently I'm looking for a weighing scale to see how much fatter I am.

The results of F-CUP Cookies are out!
My source has officially finished a box of low calorie cookies. She now claims to have gone from a measly 32A to a 36A! Apparently all you need is a box of it to go from a small A to a large A. But then again, 4 inches does make quite a lot of difference without going up a cupsize. Probably her ribcage grew as well. I wonder if there are fat deposits anywhere else (say for instance, at the booties) other than on the breast. God forbid the fat deposits to be at non-specific sites! Girls dream to be Busty, not Lumpy.

On another note, I've been savouring the luxury of having a large refrigerator and kitchen all by myself. Taking it too far even. There's this insatiable appetite in me, craving for my old Malaysian diet. As such, I'm been diligently and successfully churning out previously unattempted dishes such as Marmite Chicken and Lemon Chicken from my kitchen all week long. Due to a brief "dark period", I had a major shopping spree at Sainsburys buying whatever my heart desires. I just found out from Big Bird today, that my appetite is larger than I have perceived it to be, it takes 2 boys more than a week to finish 1kg of rice. As for me, well, one week will suffice. The prophecy that said "I will reach 45 kilos" shall materialise very soon, muahahahaha....

However, I have a new love in my life. It's TGI Friday's Jack Daniels Glazed Sirloin Steak with cheesy mash and seasoned vegetables. I asked for Medium Rare, and it was cooked to perfection!!! Brown on the outside, red and absolutely tender and juicy on the inside. HEAVENLY. I'm so in love.

p/s: I have given up on loving male humans, they are beyond cure. My new interest is now of the Bovine species. (YitLing darling muax.)

Strangely enough, I've been having a large share of blonde moments. Coupled with a strange urge to go blonde, I think I'm losing my marbles. So don't run away if you see anything strange with me.

I hate Broadgate Park

A very pissed off Ling is going to make this a short and mean post.

Friday was my day off, and I was hoping for a decent lie-in. In case you haven't heard, I've been feeling pretty down since returning from Manchester. Probably caught a bug from someone (ahem! I have some idea who) coupled with the lack of quality rest over the past few weeks, I'm now far far away from being Superwoman.

*LOUD RUDE KNOCKS*

With my eyes 25% opened, hair messed up, face randomly dotted with white pimple cream, in my sloppy PJs, I dragged my heavy ass to the door, feeling extremely annoyed.

Saw this representative from Broadgate Park (BGP)who gave me a 5 minute lecture.

"Blah Blah Blah, You will have to pay for the damages blah blah blah..."

Yes that's all that registered in my head. When she's done, I gladly closed my door in her face and crawled back in my warm nest of teddies, pillows, and cotton duvet. ZZZzzzz...

Seriously! There's no need to knock in such an uncivilized manner at a ridiculously early hour of 9am! If she had "accidentally" brokened the door, then BGP would make me pay for the damages as well. Sheesh! If it were to deliver me an English breakfast, fine, I would be more than happy to be woken up. Wake me up just to tell me to pay you more money? Forget it! I'm not so stupid lo!

Repaired damage.

All this because of 1 BIG IDIOT who decided to take a huge chunk of cement off the staircase in my accommodation block. I have no idea whatsoever about what he used to break off so much solid hard cement. From what I've gathered, the steel skeleton of the construction was stripped bare of cement, and the metal was observed to be dented as well. That explains why BGP is furious about it. Now BGP wants the entire block to pay for the damages, simply because they cannot find the culprit.

The same principle applies to the Fire Alarm thing that they also want us to pay for. It only takes 1 idiot to do something stupid, and BGP will turn it into a money making opportunity. The fire alarm rang at 4 something AM because some idiot decided that waking everyone up with the fire alarm at 4am would be FUN. It was extremely unpleasant to be standing out in the cold with only a jacket and my PJs for 30 minutes. What was even more distasteful was another "payment speech" thrown at us by another BGP rep. There's no worse way to start my day.

IT'S BLOODY UNFAIR!!!
Why should we pay for the sins of some idiot? In case BGP has forgotten, we are as innocent as they are. Furthermore, who would be stupid enough to damage his/her own accommodation block. For all we know, it could be BGP's evil plan to make us pay more because the recession is taking a toll on BGP's bank account.

Let's put it this way,
BGP is a company that earns plenty of money each academic year, all from students.
Student are here on a budget, whose income comes from their parents.

SHAME ON YOU BGP FOR TRYING TO RIP STUDENTS OFF !!!
I'm sure the cost of repairing is nothing compared to your BIG FAT BANK ACCOUNT. In contrast, every little extra cost could mean the world to a student. I'm pretty sure that BGP can fix the situation and still have PLENTY OF PROFIT to drown the manager with.

SUPER GERAM. But Big Bird came to my rescue with a magical tub of Haagen Daz Limited Edition Caramel and Cookies (I think). It's amazing how much magic some ice cream can do :D

of penises and tofu

"The level of erection hardness is measured in a scale of one to four using the Erection Hardness Score (EHS) developed by the European Association of Urology.

'Level one is like tofu where the male organ is large but not hard,

level two is similar to a peeled banana where it’s not hard enough for penetration,

level three is like an unpeeled banana where it’s hard enough for penetration but not completely,

and level four is similar to a cucumber where it’s completely hard and fully rigid'

explained said Dr Rosie King, who led the study in the Asia Pacific region from May to July 2008."

entirely extracted from an article from The Star.

My point is, WHO HAS A TOFU PENIS, HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Okay, maybe it's not that funny, it's as bad as a guy asking which girl has AA cup boobs. *Avoiding eye contact* Don't get me wrong, I love tofu to bits, along with all tofu products, especially Tau Foo Fah (My No.1 favourite dessert in the whole wide world, not even ice cream can't beat). Now everytime I see tofu, I will be reminded of men with floppy dicks. Gross-ness. *Pukes*

So this is how experts view penises, as fruits/vegetables. Might I add the study was conducted by Pfizer, the company that sells Viagra! Publicity in disguise, hohoho... They want to psycho people into needing their product. I feel sorry for men who are floppy and stupid, because 4 tablets of (any strength) Viagra can easily cost over RM 200 in Malaysia, and about 60 pounds in UK.

So boys, look after your little bros. Watch those cans of sugar loaded Coke. Don't get diabetes. Because when you get diabetes, God throws in erectile dysfunction absolutely FREE.

Manchester PM2 Mini Reunion

Manchester Trip 21 Feb 2009

I can't believe no PM2-ian so far has made an effort for a mini reunion in UK! We should start making a law about this, making this a compulsory event. Considering there are so many PM2-ians invaded the UK (Bristol, Sunderland, Manchester, Newcastle, Galway, Belfast. etc.), leaving the committed PM2-ians in Malaysia with only a few little kitties to reunite with every year. Nevermind. That makes me the pioneer, muahahahha...!

Zuo-en, Adrian and Joyce are based in Manchester universities, so it is the perfect place for a mini reunion. Partly also because they can't run away from us if we head there, hahaha, just kidding! I also managed to nag YeeLeong and Anthony to come. That, was the ideal situation.

In the end, Anthony FFK-ed us, because the transport tickets from Newcastle to Manchester is , I quote him, "too expensive"! And Joyce managed to escape to London to be with her brother. Joyce is forgivable. Anthony is found guilty, and is sentenced to be the next reunion organiser. Court is adjourned! *Slams wooden mini-hammer*

A quickie on the ones who are in UK, for the ones back home.

YeeLeong is now studying in Sunderland, instead of Belfast.

Still extremely lean and the opposite of mean, this ladies man (who never fails to help me carry my Biological Science 1&2 dumbells back in the good ol' A'Level days) charmed his way to a sweet new girlfriend, which he proudly introduced to me as, I quote YeeLeong "The Future Mrs.Lee". DingYee her name is. A 1989 Malaysian Baby. Let's see if we get wedding invitations from PohSeik or YeeLeong first =P

Then the hosts Zuo-En and Adrian took us to a very sumptuous DimSum lunch at Pacific.
Picture for Anthony to be jealous about.

Zuo-En is now very much single * Cue: GASP! *and graduating this summer! There should be plans for a reunion this summer back in Malaysia, although I won't be going home this summer =(, Zuo-En is considering of a professional career here in UK. She'll be hard to get hold of when she starts working. Partly because she won't having long summer holidays anymore, and also because she's very popular here =)

I am proud to announce that Adrian is going to be PM2's very own neurologist, and we'll also probably see him on those huge screen mamak live telecast as a goalie in the English Premier League one day. Hahaha. He was competing in football at the Manchester Malaysian Games'09 which was on the same day as well. On his love life, I think Adrian claims to be "not interested" in it. For a moment I mis-digested it as him not being interested in females. Scared me to death. I think he's just waiting for the girls to go after him when he becomes Dr. Adrian "Neurologist" Lim, rather than wasting his energy going after girls now. Heh heh.

With Lynn and DingYee (everybody practice calling Mrs.Lee) YeeLeong's female companies both from Sunderland, one for each side of his arm, hahaha. Our new friends for the day :)

That lunch is officially one of the happiest moments of my UK life, I had no idea how much I miss them until I met them. Can tell by the way we chattered non-stop, poor DingYee and Lynn was pretty lost in our conversations. Sorry! Didn't mean it. It was short, and yet it was sweet, definitely a Must-Do-Again.

A breathtaking sight outside Selfridges & Co.

I wonder if it's the Manchester Eye, because I wished that I could get on for a ride =( In the end, I went loitering and shopping around Manchester, bought a couple of stuff.

But my biggest and proudest accomplistment was still hunting down...
The Famous Krispy Kreme Doughnuts!!!

Single handedly, might I add =P
Would you believe it if I just said I followed my nose?

I will end here with a big thank you shout out to Gigi and Elwin.

Through the looking glass

Through the looking glass,
Alice struggles with the signs that are all too blur
The Cheshire Cat grins ear to ear
And yet one can get too caught up in her curiosity
in the Mad Hatter's Happy Un-birthday Tea Parties.

On the opposite side of the looking glass.
The white rabbit rushes for time
Leaving Alice more lost than ever behind
Deeming her as someone of no importance
Subjecting the seeker to defenselessness.

Stepping through the looking glass,
The white roses of the castle grounds seemed soft to the touch
but the Queen of Hearts would allow no things as such
The heat of forbindency, subject to scrutiny
One just wonders whether tomorrow is to be or not to be.

Valentines Day

Breaking news:
This just in! This girl has PASSED her First Aid Exam!!! And got a free MUG to boot too ;) Thank you all for the wishes, thank you dummy for not breaking under my thrusts, thank you anonymous-civil-engineer-volunteer-casualty for calming me down and being such a gentle casualty to me. Looking forward to my first duty =P

Eh, no one is allowed to make me perform CPR again for the next 3 days.
I have had enough practising with the poor bear on my bed.
Please faint nearer to another first aider, thank you.
Or, better still, faint near a hot guy.

*****************************************************

Whoever said being single on Valentines Day is lonely, is obviously a sick person whom no one wants to spend a moment with. I had a blast on Valentines day. Well I did spend the morning cleaning my toilet, and my muddy shoes (from the dirty snow) it somehow felt good, rather than pathetic. Unlike some people, I take pride in being clean. Gleaming white shoes and disinfectant scented toilets have endorphin-like effects on my soul =)

Of course, I did go out later in the evening. It is, Valentines Day after all.

A generous restock of my chocolate stash!
(I don't think I ever want to be attached on Valentines day again.)

A single red rose...

A sumptuous buffet dinner with 12 other singles...

A couple of glasses of alcohol for the occasion...

Myself, IngChang and 3D glasses.

A camwhore that was NOT drunk!

And that pretty much sums up my Valentines Day celebration.
My word, VDay is much fun with friends than with a significant other, I think I'm now addicted to singlehood. Hahaha! Special thanks to EeHow, Kelvin, Simon, Daniel, Shin Hau, BigBird, IngChang, Grace, and YitLing for making Vday, my day =)

F-cup cookies

Despite my constant self-tease about the mosquito bites residing on my chest, let me first convince you that any methods of breast enlargement (except by good ol' weight gain) has never EVER crossed my mind.

Let me also stress that I am perfectly aware that I'm so tit-less that LCCT probably has bigger bumps on their runway than what I have on me. No more taunting, please and thank you. I already know it.

So I heard about this thingy that got me highly amused... heard of F-Cup Cookies, anybody?
(this is probably gonna be another episode of me being just jakun-ly me)

Apparently it's a revolutionary product that threatens to put the plastic surgery of breast implants out of business! Unless of course, you want breasts from F-cup to a KKK-cup!

Behold! Sheyla Hershey with her massive 38KKK-cup implants.
Certified the World's largest tits.
100% plastic, 100% lethal.
This is something even MasterCard can't buy, simply because the card can't even be swiped through that cleavage! Cash, however, is thinner, and accepted worldwide =)

I can't help but think how she's gonna sleep. See if she tried to sleep facing down on her bed, she would have to balance herself like gasing (spinning top). LOL! Funny sight. She's lucky to be Brazillian. Should she experience UK's unforgiving 29 mph wind, she'd topple forward to land breast first on the road. But then again, the breast would've cushioned her fall so she wouldn't hurt her pretty little face. FINE. I give up, can't find anything to complain about super huge boobs. There's absolutely no excuse to NOT want them.

F-Cup Cookies claims to have Pueraria mirifica, a root herb native to South East Asia as the active ingredient. Click the herb to it's dedicated wikipedia page. My 10 minutes of google searching told me that the herb is apparently a phytoestrogen that is traditionally used to stimulate breast enlargement. Strangely enough, this was not mentioned by wikipedia one bit. Hmmm...

My source told me that the product is all the rage is Malaysia right now, and that she's taking it as well. I told her to let me know when her A-cup has grown into a Large HarMein sized bowl.

"I am Har Mein. I am yummy. Do you want to taste me in your mouth?",
said the Har Mein, seductively.

If you ask me, I have plenty of doubts about this "miracle" product. Are there clinical trials performed to prove its efficacy? Even if it doesn't produce any results, is it safe to consume this product? Cancer? Liver damage? We certainly don't want a replay of The Thalidomide Incident where a product caused thousands of babies to be born with deformity. If you're tipping the hormonal balance in your body all the time, what about period irregularity, amenorrhoea (painful periods) and mood swings?

Too many of my pharmacy-jargon-abracadabra? Here's the point.
What's the point of having great tits, when your moodswing is gonna scare any men to state of temporary impotency?

Wait, forget all that. Does the product even have a license for sale in Malaysia?

Ethically speaking, I wonder if it's a good idea to have girls who has yet to see the end of their puberty flushing their systems with plant hormones? It wouldn't turn them into a plant, but should there be any restrictions made on the sale of the product? It's like giving aspirin to under-16s so that they can develop Reye's Syndrome.

But hey, I'll give it the benefit of the doubt. There's a first time for everything. Maybe the herb has been patented by its pioneer. Judging by its popularity, maybe IT WORKS. Or maybe its just good ol' puberty doing its job. You never know.

It sucks to have small boobs, and take it from someone who has them for real. Me. I totally understand why lil' teeny boppers are so enthusiastic about this product. Who doesn't want to look gorgeous, and be desired by men (even if it's just for sexual purposes) ?

As for me, I think I'll wait for my next breast-growth-spurt, due when I start producing milk for my baby. Right now, I have learnt to accept my tit-less-ness with grace, and proud that I'm not the XL-sized superficial bitch that I thought I was. I'm just a M-sized one =D

If I were Sheyla Hershey and have someone who loves me because of my KKK tits, I'll get my implants removed into a gorgeously wrapped up box as a Valentine's day gift for him. He can make love to those silicone bags, while I get a good nights sleep lying flat on the bed on Valentine's night.

We'll see if there will be a sequel to this entry, when the results come in.
Happy Valentines Day

Love, Ling.

CNY in London

I'm on a roll! London's now out of the way, Manchester tickets in my hands and there are also plans for Birmingham and Oxford still pending! Weee~~! Manchester games anybody? Here is the mandatory London post. The conclusion of my CNY Chillax Week.

Just in case anyone's wondering my National Express Nottingham-London return tickets only cost me a mere 10.50 pounds!!! Heh heh heh... I could travel to London every month like this.

University College London, YukChang's Uni.

Met with my uncles, auntie, and several cuzzies! Took some pictures, but they were all on THEIR camera, I'm still hunting down my cousins for it. Can I just add that The Westbury Mayfair Hotel is so gorgeous! I've never been in one of the posher hotels in UK, and wow I really like this one. Solely because their door men complimented me!!! Muahahaha, I'm so biased =P Don't care, they made my day.

UCL from another vantage point.

On Sunday, I met with an OLD pal from my Taylors College days, YukChang. He deserves special mention here because he forked out in excess of 12 hours of his time, despite his extremely hectic schedule just for me. We did what us Malaysians do best, EAT and CHAT!

I think you can tell that it's going to be a food review from this point on.
HARE & TORTOISE , Japanese restaurant. 10 points for the name *BIG TICK*
YukChang used to work there so he could do some "magic" in the kitchen and at the cashier, heh heh heh. So here I am, taa-daa!

I have not had any proper sashimi in 8 months, but there were some sushis from Alfred's kitchen and buffet dinners. And God, did I miss being able to express the inner glutton in me at ALL YOU CAN EAT BUFFET at Miyako, Sheraton Subang. BEST DAMN THING.

Back to HARE & TORTOISE...

Nice or not!!! I did put this up on purpose, because i <3 roes!
YukChang doesn't take them because he thinks they're too fishy.
In this case, I think it's fishy delicacy with a characteristic texture. This. Is HALF filled with roe, unlike the Jusco versions that gives barely enough to cover the rice!

The one who made my stomach very happy that day.

Unagi sushi, simply amazing!
Other tables get 4 pieces, but we got the entire eel's worth =P

And then the SALMON PLATTER came!!! *HYPERVENTILATES*
Crazy fella ordered this, but then told me he doesn't fancy raw food.
So WHY did you work in a sushi restaurants lah!
He made me finish all the juicy bits of fatty salmon, which I willingly obliged.
Those are some super thick, and generous portions of flesh I might add.
With generous streaks of fish fat loaded with Omega 3!

See that smug look on my face + a contented grin.
I've always wondered how sushi will be like in this part of the world.
Would it be "westernised" to cater to the delicate non-Asian stomach?
The conclusion that I have arrived at, is that at HARE & TORTOISE, at least those that I ate, the sashimi has never been more FRESH! I think it's partly because the weather was icy cold with the snow falling outside, that kept the sashimi, cold and fresh!

For dessert, we went to the cake shop next door, I dont' remember the name now.
This is Tiramisu and Pistachio gelato.
Nothing to shout about though. Quite nice lah.

The blackforest cake however was a masterpiece!
The texture was very light and fresh. Despite a tummy full of sushi, I did not experience the slightest hint of "jelat-ness", in fact I felt like I could eat 2 more!

Just when I was feeling extremely happy after a gratifying meal, something had to happen to ruin my weekend. And I thought I couldn't get more unlucky =.="

I missed my bus. AGAIN.
This time, because of adverse weather disrupting London's otherwise efficient public transport. Both the London Underground and the buses weren't operating normally.

I AM SO TIRED OF HAVING BAD THINGS HAPPENING TO ME T__T

In the end, YukChang decided to subsidise my new bus ticket to get back to Nottingham.
By that point, I was totally freaking out!!! I've got a test on Monday and I haven't studied a single word for it! We're talking about 1 of 10 tests that will account for 15% of a 30 credit module here!!! In addition to that, I'm already spending over my budget in London!

I was very close to buying a train ticket home out of desperation.
But then the miser in me woke up when the cash register flashed a deadly 53 POUNDS for a single ride from London to Nottingham. Bah. I'd rather wait, than be ripped off!!!

Poor fella stayed back and accompanied me in Starbucks for an addition 6 hours or so, until my next ride is here. It was a good opportunity to catch up even further. And I was glad that I was in London, being part of the "worst snowing episode in 2 decades" phenomenon.

After all, we don't get to experience this everyday.
Just in case you're wondering I did get back to Nottingham at 2am Monday morning, and obtained a very decent score in my test =D Yay me!